I’ve been quiet for a while because I spent several weeks last month recuperating from what is considered a routine exam at the doctor’s office. Having a highly sensitive body can be especially challenging sometimes. And, what they say about our bodies becoming even more sensitive as we get older, I’ve discovered is true. Perhaps, you have too?
So, I was reluctant to return to the doctor and report how my body had responded. I was afraid she’s want to poke around and cause a flare-up of the pain I was slowly leaving behind as I recuperated.
Yet, everyone I spoke to about it encouraged me to go back. So, I finally did, when I was starting to feel better.
Have you ever spoken to someone who appears to be listening to you but at almost every opportunity tells you about their situation, as if it was true for you too? I know you have if you’re a recovering people-pleaser or highly sensitive. We listen with caring and respect and too often others seem to be listening but are really listening for how they can talk about themselves. That’s how it’s been with this new doctor for me.
What I find interesting is that having a productive and low stress conversation with people like this may be possible. But, I’m really not sure. I’m certainly more assertive than I used to be but I find I have more difficulty being assertive with someone when I don’t know them well and am just developing a relationship with them; like this doctor.
Unless I really needed to speak again to someone who communicates this way, I wouldn’t, so I most likely wouldn’t develop a relationship with them. That can make it feel difficult when we do need to talk to them again, like I needed to tell this doctor what had happened.
I also don’t like having to back up everything I say to prove my point. This feels like arguing to me which I really dislike and leaves me wanting to retreat to peace and quiet afterwards.
What I think would be far more productive in speaking with a doctor, would be to find one who is sensitive and caring, a great listener, and is willing to offer and discuss possible options with their patients. And, perhaps most importantly, is willing to acknowledge that their patient knows a great deal about their body. (I really do hate that word, “patient”! We’re clients, not people patiently waiting in the waiting room, patiently waiting to be cured by them!)
There are a few medical personnel like that out there. My nurse practitioner in Michigan was like that. So, I’m out to find one. I hope you are inspired to find one too, if you’re needing more attentive care.